Have you ever been around a group of adults and suddenly thought, Wait… aren't we too old for this?
The jealousy. The gossip. The little comments. People leaving someone out. Someone getting upset because another person received attention or an opportunity.
And then there is the simple, “I don't like her.”
Sometimes someone doesn't like another person for a very good reason. Maybe they had a bad experience or something happened between them. That's life. We don't have to like everyone.
And the truth is, not everybody is going to like us either. That's normal. We won't be everyone's favorite person, and we don't need to be. As long as we're treating people with basic respect and kindness, we don't have to spend our lives trying to make everyone like us.
But sometimes it becomes something bigger. One person doesn't like someone, so suddenly everyone is expected to feel the same way. People start taking sides, avoiding someone, or talking about them when they're not around—even when they don't really know what happened.
You would think we would leave some of that behind when we grew up.
But sometimes we don't.
And honestly, I don't think it's because people are bad. We all carry parts of ourselves from different times in our lives. Sometimes old habits show up again, especially when we feel insecure, left out, overlooked, or like someone else is getting something we wanted.
Jealousy can be like that.
Someone gets a promotion, a compliment, a new relationship, a beautiful home, or an opportunity, and instead of simply being happy for them, something inside us says, What about me?
That feeling can happen to anyone.
The important part is what we do with it.
We don't have to pretend we never feel jealous. We can notice it, ask ourselves why it bothered us, and decide what we want to do with that feeling instead of letting it turn into gossip or resentment.
Sometimes a quiet page in a journal can help us sort out what we're feeling before we put it on someone else. That's the spirit behind NonaEve's self-love journals: a little room to be honest with ourselves, without judgment or pressure to have everything figured out.
The same thing happens with workplace drama.
Sometimes people form little groups. Someone is “in,” someone is “out,” and suddenly adults are dealing with the same kind of social tension we thought we left behind at school.
It can be tempting to join in, especially when everyone around you is talking about someone else.
But sometimes you can simply think, That's their experience with that person. It doesn't have to become mine.
You don't have to take sides. You don't have to dislike someone because someone else does. And you don't have to become friends with everyone either.
You can just be respectful and make your own judgment based on your own experience.
Someone else's success doesn't mean you failed.
Someone else's beauty doesn't take away from yours.
Someone getting attention doesn't mean there is less attention left for you.
There is room for all of us.
We're human, so we're probably never going to stop having moments of jealousy, irritation, or insecurity. But we can become a little better at catching ourselves before those feelings turn into something that hurts someone else—or makes our own life more stressful.
Maybe growing up isn't about never feeling those things.
Maybe it's about realizing we don't have to act on every feeling we have.
Life is already complicated enough. So let's choose kindness where we can.
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